Monday, July 11, 2016

When a punishment goes too far

There was a lot of very bad behavior this weekend by foster son at a family event.  In the course of one of the "episodes" there was a warning that he would lose a day of summer camp if it continued, it did.  I progressed to a week, then the whole summer.  At that point of the episode, he was too far gone to even be aware of consequences and I totally should have recognized that, but I didn't.  So I made the error of taking away all of summer camp.  Not an appropriate consequence, despite his episode.

So, now what do I do?  I don't want to give it back when it is a consequence, so I have to find a way of him getting it back but still following through on the punishment.  This is what we came up with....

He will lose 7 days of tablet time (his idea)
We chose 3 of his favorite toys and he had to pick one to "pack away" for now.
He has to write apology notes to each person that was involved in the episode.
Also has to accomplish the following chores:
Sweep (hardwood with a broom)
Vacuum carpets
Clean bathroom sink
Clean doorknobs and cabinet knobs
Pull weeds
Clean up dog poop

I told him when everything is completed properly, he may go back to camp.  He'll probably only miss one or two days at most, but that's ok.  I think this worked out ok.  I'd love to hear any comments or suggestions about it.